Pre-College Jitters

So, why is it that every time I feel the need to write is when it's pretty late and I can't sleep? Scratch that.

I'ts 3:00 am and five hours from now I will be on my way to my college dorm in VCU. It'll be my freshman year, and perhaps maybe the first real separation I will get from home. When big things like this come, I usually won't feel the pressure or the loneliness until the night before; oh and yes, I get grumpy the day before too. With all the travelling I did in my life-time, going back and forth from my dad's place to my mom's, to my mom's place to my brother's, so on and so forth, shouldn't I be used to this by now? But i'm not.

The idea of me going into college and leaving home for the first time seems very exciting, but I never thought I would be as nervous as this. If only I didn't have a dog, things would be much easier... I guess. It irritates me whenever my mom starts talking of me going back home, when at the first place I haven't even left yet. I know she is just being a mother, concern for her only daughter and I respect that; but for the first time in my life, I want to be independent, and moving out is the safest way to do it.

I'd like to think of college as the barrier that separates what you were to what you will be in the near future. It's a pretty tough path in a man's life, one that will make or break a person. I don't know what my outcome will be, what classes i'll fall in love with, professors i'll despise, or friendships i'll earn; but, whatever they may be, i'd hope to start with, "So far, so good."